This Is Going To Hurt

So your future has just walked through the front door, tall and handsome and smiling. It doesn’t look like work, you like work. It looks like another reality. Suddenly that one-room home with the dirt floor is just what you really wanted all along. Your world might be small but it’s comfortable, and right now it looks pretty good. How can you say politely “I hate to be rude but could you please get out of here? I won’t tell anyone you’ve been here, if you’ll just leave quietly.”

That future reminds you of things you haven’t thought of in years, maybe music you used to love but haven’t listened to or a dream you had when you were young and naïve enough to believe dreams do come true. That future is a mirror of what might have been you after a lifetime of good days and great decisions. It’s a crazy pipe dream that walked into the wrong house, and why is God so cruel as to give you a vision of something that it isn’t possible to have?

Would God give you a vision of something that was impossible? Isn’t it more like Him to increase your desire so that you weep with disappointment when you can’t have it, or even more, can’t believe it? “Delight yourself also in the Lord and He shall give you the desires of your heart,” right? God is more good and true than we can imagine on our most faithful day. He does not work in mysterious ways, not really. He works in ways that we can see and taste and touch and hurt over. Sometimes your dream (or your belief in your dream) is delayed just so your desire can increase. This is awful. This is painful. This is how He sometimes works.

Sometimes I wish God weren’t so dedicated to my dreams. I wish the process were easy, or at least less painful. I wish I could become the person I want to become by going to sleep one night, having a really great Joseph-style dream, and waking up new and shiny and filled with perfect thoughts. Can you imagine showing up at work a brand new person? Let everyone else deal with it, brother, because I am *now* the person God meant me to be. I have become my destiny… overnight.

It’s not that I mind the process of change; I mind very much that the process hurts. If it’s going to hurt, I want it to hurt overnight while I’m asleep and no one can watch. Ever seen that quote “Be the change you wish to see in the world?” No one says “Become the change you wish to see in the world.” It’s a subtle yet profound difference.

That difference is going to hurt.

The hurt is worth it.

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Filed under New Life, New Season

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